You Don’t Have To Accept Being Taken For Granted: Part II

Step Back And Check Your Messages

intuitionOn Thursday, I shared with you Part One of this two-part series on how to stop being taken for granted. That post ended with an exercise that, if you did it, would have led you into an appreciation, if not full understanding, why people in your life continue to take advantage of you. Check out that exercise before moving on to the next steps in this process.

As said in that earlier post, many people have written and spoken on this topic of taking advantage of others or being the one who is being taken for granted. They have provided insights, exercises and in-depth information on the matter yet many of us still fail to shake off the victim cloak. Here is one such article that provides a great summary of why people take you for granted. Check out the full article here but as a highlight, these are 5 of the reasons why this “happens” to you, according to Ankush Bahuguna, author of the piece:

  1. You are non-confrontational
  2. You cannot refuse people
  3. You are usually the one with no opinion
  4. You are always seeking approval for your actions
  5. You are indecisive

Check out the other five reasons people take you for granted from this article and let us move on to the steps to end this.

Step #3 – Share You Desire With The ‘Offender’

have a conversation
Share your feelings, wants and needs

You have reflected on the relationship you are having with X person and have identified the ways it could be better and mutually supportive and not them always taking and you constantly giving. Time to take discourse to the next level.

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The third step is to share your desire with the person in question. Without rancour, blaming or shaming, state your need and what you are willing to do to change the nature of the relationship. As well, and again without bitterness, say what you are unable to continue accepting. That is called establishing your boundary. This is something many of us missed learning growing up but it is never too late.

Some might get defensive no matter how you present the information. That is on them, so do not fall into the guilt trap. Others will surprise you by their welcoming of the offer to renew and expand the relating.

Step #4 – Congratulate Yourself

Whatever the response to your decision to no longer be the withdrawal account, the door mat, The Fixer, your fourth and last step in this is to congratulate yourself for seeing this through!

new teeth
You will lose some but you will find a good dentist!

Believe me, I have had to do this very exercise many times. It is one that you will have to repeat several times until you have cleared your life of takers and everyone entering reads the memo: “This woman (or man) is no pushover! Most important is to enjoy the process, even through the pain – they are just teething pain and will pass once the new tooth has burst the gum.

Should you need any further tips, subscribe to my monthly newsletter and receive many others in your inbox. As well, sign up for my Webinars – the next one is “A Practical Spirituality For The Busy Woman,” and starts on Sunday, August 30. Check it out here and secure your space as it is FREE and space is limited.

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Have a fantastic Saturday!


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4 thoughts on “You Don’t Have To Accept Being Taken For Granted: Part II

  1. eliz frank

    I couldn’t stop laughing over that mouth full of broken teeth. You’ve got a point there; taking back ones power after a period of being taken for granted is like teething pain, and that too shall pass!

    1. Ms Claudette

      This too shall pass – and the “lost” teeth might not grow back due to age but there is always dentures!!! LOL

  2. This is something I love reading like this series, thanks for sharing this.

    1. Ms Claudette

      I am glad you liked it. 🙂

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