A Man On Older Women And Online Dating

Older Women – Every Young Man’s Dream

Okay, just so you know, I am happily married. That, however, does not mean that at some point in my life have not done what all men dream to do.

older women
The Scarlet Woman No More???

And what is that? Date older women – cougars as some refer to them.

Older women who date men younger than they are, are known as “cougars” in most social circles, and they are awesome! Cougar is a slang term that refers to a woman who seeks sexual relations with considerably younger men regardless of the age difference. These days the age gap in romantic liaisons is widely celebrated, dumping the common rule that it is only right to be interested in someone who is half your age, plus seven years.

Times Are Changing

While most women, if I were to guess, are naturally attracted to older men because they offer resources and stability, women who already have these for themselves are more interested in  younger men. Some such women, offer these two – resources and stability – in return for certain commitments.

Evolving Time
Evolving Time

Online cougar dating platforms have made this an easy venture.

These days, many younger men crave the experience and wisdom that older women offer. While dating a younger man can be awkward for many older women, it is very liberating for younger men. Younger men love to explore, are highly energetic and love the maturity and sexual experience that comes with dating an older woman.

Easily bored by the everyday nuances of commonplace dating with women of their age, it is understandable why more and more younger men are gravitating towards older women for what they have to offer – materially and sexually. While some men condemn these older women/younger men relationships, most are embracing it in the society today as more and more women, both single and married, are finding fun in indulging in these connections with young, energetic men.

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Commitment And Style Attractions

At the heart of cougar dating, let us call it, is the issue of commitment. Although everything appears to be working out fine between the younger man and older woman, many of these guys are not ready for commitment. Once their relationship with women of their own age or close, get to the “noose” point, they prefer to bow out of it and not commit themselves. Until that time or age arrives when they are ready to commit, they are mostly into relationships for fun, except a few exceptional cases whereby the feelings are real. That is where their connection and comfort with older women come into play.

Not ready to put a ring on it.
Not ready to put a ring on it.

For most cougars who have been in the game for long, they have discovered that with young men commitment is a sensitive issue and so long as getting them to make one is not on the agenda, then there is no problem and the relationship works for both sides.

Another consideration for some men from the get-go is the lady’s dressing.  Guys who date older women seem to be attracted to the ones who dress to look younger. The more skimpy the outfit, the more exhilarating. On their part, men who date older women, tend to dress more conservatively, thinking that the women want them to look more responsible – which in most cases is true.

Most cougars are confident in their social and financial status and are aware of the appeal that both hold for younger men. They know that younger men might not be as financially buoyant as she is or men her age. She probably does not care about this so long as she is getting what she wants.

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Here To Stay

Whatever your personal view of these relationships, the issues in them and the longevity of older women/younger men relationships, as time passes they will be more commonplace.

General acceptance of older women/younger men relationships might not be that far off as the current data shows that the number of relationships and marriages between older women and extremely younger men have been on a rapid increase, gaining more ground as the years go. The Internet has made it easier for them to find each other and the number of websites and online cougar dating platforms are definitely abundant and growing every day.


Robert Turner
Robert Turner

Robert lives in Georgia, and is a freelance writer. He enjoys a healthy debate as much as the next guy and writes short stories and inspirational books in his spare time. Robert brings to this blog a male perspective on issues related to and/or of concern to women around the world. Check out his most recent post on men and trust issues after a relationship ends.

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15 thoughts on “A Man On Older Women And Online Dating

  1. […] fluff but short on details. Regular readers know that I am single and do have profiles on a couple dating sites. Okay, fine, a few! My profile is not a very popular one. Yes, my pictures attract some attention, […]

  2. This reminds me of Catherine the Great and her series of young lovers. ^_^

    1. Ms Claudette

      That’s funny but really true! 🙂

  3. I definitely do see it more often as the years pass. It doesn’t matter to me what age people are as long as they’re legal. 😉

    1. Ms Claudette

      To each his own – is what I am getting from your comment Liz and I could not agree more. Namaste. 🙂

  4. Each relationship is different. I think it depends on why they are coming together if the relationship will last or not. I am a few years younger than my husband and I like it that way. My sister has been happily married to a man 10 years older than her and my uncle has been married to a woman 14 years older than him and they have been happily married for over 30 years. I would say age only matters in certain situations.

    1. Ms Claudette

      You are so correct. I dated a guy 11 years younger than me some time ago and was told that it wouldn’t work. It didn’t not because of our age differences but because of other more complex issues. Thanks for sharing! 🙂

  5. With divorce being more common nowadays many people are getting a second chance at love or maybe lust. It’s good to hear that older women are breaking away from previous stigmas and doing what they want without fear of judgement.

    1. Ms Claudette

      It indeed is a good thing. Thank you Jason for comment! 🙂

  6. I’m all for happiness in a relationship. Sometimes that means the other partner is a very different age, and other times they’re close. Love is love 🙂

    1. Ms Claudette

      Amen to that! 🙂

  7. To each his or her own! I can’t imagine dating a younger guy – but I’ve been married for more than 30 years!

    1. Ms Claudette

      Yes indeed! 🙂

  8. Robin Rue (@massholemommy)

    I think everyone has their own thing. I am personally not attracted to younger men, but I am not attracted to guys a lot older than I am either.

    1. Ms Claudette

      I hear you as I am so not attracted to men a lot older than me either! Tried it and absolutely hated it! LOL

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