Motivational Monday: When Life Sucks, Get Lollipops

Speaking with a young mother recently, it was disheartening to hear her say that her life feels over.

Having not travelled much beyond her hometown, with small children to raise and a modest income, she felt there is not much more to life than what is.

How do you convince someone that this is not true?

You do not. They have to figure it out themselves. So, I kept quiet and wrote this instead – hope she sees it.

Life Sucks But So Does a Lollipop

“Life is what you make it,” is one of those sayings that can either motivate or aggravate you, correct? The thing though, it is true and even at almost 30 years of age you can suck the heck out of it.

My suggestion to anyone, whatever their age or circumstance in life is: “Do not get comfortable with where you are or what you have achieved.”

Get Comfortable With Discomfort

stevejobIt is as Contributor, Michael H. Ballard, wrote recently, “learn from your pain.” Let the suckiness of life open your palate to what else is available and it does not necessarily mean you must have a wad of cash or win the lottery to get to its sweetness.

Many have settled, gotten comfortable with where they are and have become stagnant in their desires to see the more that life has to offer. Tim Chin puts it this way in Elite Daily:

  1. Stay Hungry: Remember those goals and dreams you’ve always had? There’s no excuse why you can’t achieve them. Even if you’ve tried and failed….Continue to better yourself…. Crave something that adds value to the person you are, and make investments in the person you want to become.

  2. Stay Foolish: Fools are the fastest learners because they act upon passion and excitement and make unconventional decisions…They are able to learn from their mistakes and project themselves further because they spend no time waiting for things to happen.

The late Steve Jobs made similar suggestions in a much-popularised commencement speech at Stanford in 2005, as did Jim Carrey in his 2014 commencement speech at Maharishi University.

Before you dismiss these suggestions as mumblings and platitudes of self-indulgent celebrities, do not. Remember the backgrounds of many of today’s celebrities. Take Jim Carrey. The actor and comedian was born here in Canada – Newmarket, Ontario. According his official biography, “Carrey got his start with a spot doing stand-up at a Toronto comedy club when he was just 15 years old. By 1979, he had left the factory job as a janitor he had taken in 1978 to help support his family and was making his living as the opening act for successful comics Buddy Hackett and Rodney Dangerfield.” Read more.

You do not have to be born with a gold spoon in your mouth to eat with one later in life. Claudette P. Esterine

What it takes is a willingness to keep living, keep sucking your lollipop as you make lemonade with the lemons life presents to you.

Guide to Optimistic Opportunism

That was the title of a post that I wrote last year May and published at my former blog site – Daughters of Sheba – at blogspot. Maybe the young lady did not see it last year so will quote the main points for her and for you as well, should you be needing a guide to optimistic opportunism. Be advised that I exercised my editorial right and did minor tweaking:

chalkboard-620316_640“Sometimes I go off on a retreat to a park, by a body of water or just sitting on the floor in a quiet corner of Chapter’s. I find myself needing this when life seems brings me way more than manageable for me.

In these, ‘by myself’ moments, I ponder these questions:

  • How do I really feel about what is happening, all crap aside?
  • The negative emotions that I am having, what are they trying to tell me?
  • Does anything need to change for me to feel good again? If yes, what?

By the end of this talk with myself, followed by intense listening, a plan is in place. There are times when the plan will come quickly, at least a first step. Other times, it takes a few hours, days or even months.

What is immediate, however, is being washed in a feeling of optimism.

Optimism and opportunism go hand in hand – that is what I learned in my 40+ years on this Earth. Think positively and for yourself and seize every opportunity that comes as a result.

Want to be happier? Think positive thoughts about your life right where you are at now. Right there on the cot in the back room of your friend’s house. Know that you have all that you need now in that bowl of macaroni and cheese!

Want a job that uses your gifts, talents and passion? Be thankful for the one you have now that will give you a good reference. Recognize the skills you gained doing all those seemingly deadbeat jobs.

Want a more life-enhancing relationship and genuine friends? Well, first express your gratitude to those who helped you to know what you truly want. Write them letters. No need to mail them but the act of sharing a blessing with them will improve your sense of freedom to choose again.

“Drink from Life’s glass instead of complaining about the colour of the container! The more you appreciate the contents of your cup, the more and greater will be added unto you.” (This has become a popular quote of mine on Facebook. You can receive a downloadable and printable copy of this lovely poster when you join my KB Life list.

girl-657737_1280So my dear young friend and you, my dear reader who might be thinking that life sucks, take some time off by yourself and do an inventory of your situation. Find those areas where you might be experiencing the greatest “sourness” and try this process. Ask yourself the three questions:

  1. How do I really feel about what is happening?
  2. The negative emotions that I am having, what are they trying to tell me?
  3. Does anything need to change for me to feel good again? If yes, what?

Step four requires no questions but actions. As the good Scripture says, “Faith without works is dead,” step four is to walk your talk – those answers to the three questions. How can you incrementally start bringing back fun, interest, fresh experiences and revitalizing of the dreams you put aside, or modified versions, when you had the kids?

Need help? Drop me a line, subscribe and receive updates from me right in your inbox.


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